


A Case of Mistaken Identity

by mariposaroja



Series: Bizarre Love Triangle [1]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, M/M, Valentine's Day gone wrong, loras' dreams come true, renly is a very intelligent idiot, renly is basically fucked
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-17 07:46:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11847114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariposaroja/pseuds/mariposaroja
Summary: Renly just wanted the ground to swallow him up. There he was, naked as the day he was born on the floor after falling out of bed with a man who was categorically not his girlfriend while said girlfriend stood over him wearing nothing but a (very attractive) set of lacy red underwear. “I used the key.”Margaery looked as if she would burst out laughing at any moment. “Yes, I can see that. But would you care to tell me why you’re in bed with my brother?”





	A Case of Mistaken Identity

Making sure her most charming smile was secure on her face, Margaery sauntered up to the reception desk, her stilettos clicking menacingly against the polished marble floor with every step. “Good afternoon,” she greeted the building manager, Penrose, whom she had become very well acquainted with.

“Ms Tyrell,” giving a brief nod of his head, the corner of his mouth tugged upwards, “Shall I call Ms Stark?”

“If you wouldn’t mind ever so much.”

Without saying another word, Penrose picked up the phone, leaving Margaery to gaze up at the impressive glass walls that seemed to go on for miles, one at each side of the lobby, dividing east from west. It was a rather remarkable building, she had to admit, though it remained to be seen whether the _avant garde_ architecture would withstand the test of time.

“Good afternoon, Sansa. I have Ms Tyrell down here in the lobby- yes, of course. I’ll tell her.” The click of the phone being returned to its cradle prompted the brunette to turn around once again. “She’ll be down in a moment. You can-“

“Take a seat over there,” she chuckled, “Yes, I believe I’m familiar with the procedure. Thanks for your help, as always.”

“Any time, Ms Tyrell.”

*

Letting out a whistle, Margaery grinned as Sansa’s cheeks turned almost as red as her dress. “What do you think?” she asked, doing a little sashay that earned her a number of appreciative looks from both men and women passing by. Margaery couldn’t exactly blame them; Sansa Stark more often than not looked like she belonged in a high fashion magazine rather than a corporate law firm.

“It’s certainly very appropriate for the day that’s in it. You look absolutely stunning. In fact, maybe I should be a little bit worried…”

Rolling her eyes, the trainee linked her arm with her friends. “As if _you_ have anything to be worried about. Besides,” she began before catching herself and averting her gaze as quickly as she could.

 _If only…_ “ _Besides_ , you only have eyes for my brother. I’m very sorry to tell you that he is, and will remain for the foreseeable future, very, _very_ gay. But worry not, I have two other brothers that look enough like Loras that you’ll hardly know the difference. Trust me.”

“Isn’t Garlan engaged?”

She pursed her scarlet lips. “Very true. Well, that still leaves Willas. He’s probably the nicest of the lot of us, he’s the heir to Highgarden, and- _and_ \- he’s straight as they come.”

“I’m not sure he would take too kindly to your trying to marry him off to the first person who asks,” Sansa pointed out, trying to hide her embarrassment by pressing the call button for the lift once or twice more than was strictly necessary.

“Pff, well he’s doing a pretty poor job of finding a wife himself so someone has to pick up the slack.”

The red head could only shake her head in disbelief as they stepped into the lift once those who were descending had disembarked, hitting the button for the 25th floor without even having to think about it. “Are you two going for a Valentines lunch?”

“Unfortunately not. He’s working through so that he’ll be able to make the Valentines _dinner_ tonight. I’m just popping in for some assurance that I won’t be spending the entire night alone and sexless.” If there was anything that could be said to be true of Margaery Tyrell it would be that she certainly did not mince her words. Rolling her eyes at her friend’s little cough, uncaring that they weren’t alone in the lift, Margaery arched a brow. “Come now, Sansa. You know just as well as I that sometimes- _often_ \- he has to be forcibly removed from the building.”

“He’s really busy,” Sansa said in defence of her boss, “And surely he wouldn’t miss your first Valentine’s Day together...”

“Hmmph, you’d be surprised.”

*

Lips pursed (probably rather unattractively), Renly’s fingers drummed against the wood of his desk as he shifted restlessly in his office chair, trying to come up with a sensible course of action to his problem that didn’t involve going back to the client and telling her that they could take the matter no further. “Come on, _think_. We must have dealt with something like this before…” And yet he could think of nothing. Growling in frustration, Renly picked up his desk phone, securing it between his ear and his shoulder. His foot tapped to the rhythm of the dial tone, waiting for his trainee to pick up the phone. Usually he would have hung up after a couple of rings but this time he let it go all the way to voicemail, such was his desperation.

In fact, he was just about to call Stannis’ trainee when a familiar head of red hair seemed to glow behind the frosted glass of his door. His ‘come in!’ pre-empted the knock. “I was just looking for you-“ the partner began, words dying in his throat when he saw who accompanied Sansa. “Margaery, this is a surprise.”

Her grin was positively dazzling. “Sorry to pop in unannounced but I just wanted a quick word…”

Beckoning her in, Renly walked around the side of his desk to greet her with a kiss. “I didn’t say it was a bad surprise. But I have something very important that I need Sansa to get working on straight away, would you mind waiting just a minute?”

“Of course, I’ll just step outside-“

“No need, just make yourself comfortable,” directing his attention to the other woman, he perched on the edge of the desk, “I need you to make a call to EUIPO and ask if they’ve received our amended specification letter for the Mother of Dragons mark. I know full well that they haven’t because it’s not on the portal but it might push them to get the ball rolling. Once that’s done I need to draft a reply to the email we received this morning from Viserys’ rep. Tell him that we’re taking instructions from our client and that we’ll revert in due course. At least then the ball’s out of our court for a bit.”

Nodding, Sansa tried to commit all that to memory, wishing she’d thought to pick up her notepad before coming in. “So hound EUIPO about the letter and draft a reply to Viserys, got it. I take it this takes precedence over the AMLs?”

Renly rubbed his face wearily. “I forgot about those. Maybe rope Gendry in to help with that. I’m sure Stannis will have had him do some anti-money laundering already.”

Grinning, Sansa made for the door. “Will do. I’m sure he’ll jump at the chance, Stannis keeps him on a rather tight leash.”

“Well, tell him that Uncle Renly’s got his back.” With his trainee gone, he was free to return his attention to the most beautiful woman in all of London, probably even the UK. “Sorry about that, things are pretty hectic around here at the moment.” Margaery merely arched an eyebrow, a look on her face that had him shaking his head. “No, I’m going to be out of here in time. I pr-“

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Renly.”

Ideally, he would have been able to make that promise regardless of that statement, but he knew that he couldn’t in good faith. Wrapping his arms around her waist, Renly pressed his lips softly against hers, grateful that her red lipstick was practically bulletproof. “Then I promise I will try my absolute hardest to get out of here in time, how’s that? You can even give Sansa permission to prod me until I leave.”

She didn’t doubt he meant it, but whether or not it would come to pass was another story altogether. “We shall see. I have something for you as a back-up plan, however.” It didn’t take her long at all to find what she was looking for in her purse, and she took her boyfriend’s hand, pressing it into his open palm.

“A key?” Renly’s eyebrows practically disappeared above his hairline, and he would certainly deny it if anyone said that there was the slightest hint of panic in his voice. “Are you asking me to move in with you?”

“Of course I’m not asking you to move in with me. In the event that you don’t make it out in time, I want to make sure that the night isn’t completely wasted. Come over and I’ll have a nice Valentine’s surprise waiting for you,” she winked, stealing another kiss before heading for the door, thoroughly amused by the smug look on the solicitor’s face.

“I’ll be seeing you later on.”

“Yes, you _will_.”

*

Renly was cautiously optimistic. The closer it got to seven o’clock and the more he cleared from his desk the more that optimism grew. By the time quarter to seven came around, he was all but ready to start packing up for a speedy and efficient exit… that was until there was a knock at the door.

Groaning, the partner silently prayed that it would be Sansa ordering him to get out of there as he called for whomever it was to come in. The door opened and it was all Renly could do to keep from letting his head fall against the desk with a thud. “Do us both a favour and turn around and walk back out that door, Stannis.”

“If you could actually be an adult for a minute, Renly, I have something important that I need to talk to you about.”

“By all means, as long as I’m out of here in,” he looked at his watch, “twelve and a half minutes.”

The head of Corporate and managing partner in practice if not name sat in one of the chairs opposite him. That certainly wasn’t a good sign. Stannis was not usually one to linger. “And here I thought we were one of the Magic Circle, not some pokey probate firm. Tywin Lannister is adamant that he wants to make changes in our argument to the Court of Justice. He’s requested an emergency meeting for a half hour’s time.”

Renly really couldn’t put into words just how much he hated Tywin Lannister. Scoffing, the head of Technology leaned back in his chair, arms folded against his chest. “Easily known that it has nothing to do with Robert. Tywin wouldn’t dare interrupt his precious daughter’s Valentine’s Day plans.”

“Are you joking? I’m pretty sure this was done at her request. Either way our good brother was only too delighted by the turn of events. He’s spearheading the meeting personally.”

Absolutely fantastic. Not only would he miss his romantic dinner with his girlfriend, he would get to spend the rest of the evening with both his brothers for his sins. Knowing there was absolutely zero chance he was going to get out of this one, Renly pinched the bridge of his nose. “Fine. But if my girlfriend dumps me then just know that I’m inviting myself to Sunday dinner at yours every week for the foreseeable future.” It was a complete lie; Renly wasn’t sure there was anything in the world (except perhaps his niece, Shireen) that could persuade him to spend that much time with Stannis, his rather unpleasant wife, Selyse, and their strange au pair.

The other man’s lips pressed into a hard line as he rose. “Valentine’s is nothing but a farcical day created to pander to the whims of materialistic narcissists.”

“Right. And I suppose saving the children is the reason why you’re head of Corporate in one of Europe’s biggest firms. Gotcha.”

Stannis didn’t even bother responding to that, too used to his brother’s cheek. “Room 16 at quarter past, Renly. Don’t be late.”

Renly waited until his brother was gone and the door closed to groan and pick up his phone. More fool he for thinking that it was all going to work out. There were times when he questioned whether all of this was even worth it, and this was definitely one of those times. Margaery undoubtedly deserved someone who was more available, but as long as she was willing to stick around he would certainly let her. Anyone else might have already left, by Margaery appeared to like his status as one of the city’s best lawyers almost as much as he did.

The phone barely rang twice before it was answered. “Use the key.” That was all she said, no preamble, no pleasant greetings… hell, he didn’t even get a chance to utter an apology before she’d hung up on him, clearly unsurprised by the change of plan. He felt like a horrible person, but all he could do at this stage was try to get out of the office at a somewhat reasonable hour. Who knows, maybe he could usurp control of the meeting from his brother to get it over with as soon as possible…

*

There was a saying about the best laid plans that Renly possibly should have taken note of. By the time he climbed out of a cab, throat sore from speaking and eyes heavy and tired, it was closer to one o’clock in the morning than it was to midnight. He’d contemplating going straight back to his apartment, not wanting to wake Margaery up and add insult to injury, but ultimately decided that he owed her at least _something._ Making his way into the building, Renly greeted the security man who looked just as bored as he always did before making his way to the lift. In a matter of minutes he was standing outside his girlfriend’s door, turning the key in the lock.

Unsurprisingly, though he couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment, it was pitch black inside. Using the brightness of his phone to guide the way rather than turning on the lights, Renly shrugged of his coat and folded it over the back of the couch, leaving his shoes close to the wall and out of the way. Silently as he could, he crept along the hall, trying to remember which door led where. They, more often than not, used Renly’s flat instead as its location was a lot more convenient and he’d never had to navigate it in the middle of the night. The first door was the bathroom, he remembered that much, so he bypassed that without as much as a look inside. The second was slightly ajar, so he slowly pushed it open, grinning when he could clearly see a bed and wild curls fanned out against the pillow.

Feeling suddenly rejuvenated, he stripped down completely, wondering if Margaery would mind him waking her at one o’ clock in the morning for sex after standing her up on Valentine’s Day of all days. He’d soon find out.

Renly pulled back the covers and slipped into the bed beside her, shuffling close enough that he could feel her breath on his face. Grinning to himself, he pressed his lips against hers, a pair of golden eyes slowly opening in confusion as he began to kiss her. The confusion didn’t last long, and soon she was humming as she kissed him back. It was as if he’d been hit by a bolt of lightning, and all Renly could think as he brushed a stray curl out of her face was that he’d never been so turned on by a kiss in his life. Although, there was little that wouldn’t seem heavenly, he supposed, after spending hours on end stuck in the same room with his brothers and Tywin Lannister.

His eyes rolled back in his head as he felt her warm palm press against him, already completely hard and ready to go. Suddenly very impatient, Renly rolled onto his back, pulling Margaery up on top of him. The friction was absolutely perfect, until something poking him in the hip prompted him to swiftly open his eyes, kiss long forgotten. It took his fried brain a little longer than it probably should have to realise that that was something that really shouldn’t have been there. That’s when he saw it, the little- or not so little- differences that instantly told him that his girlfriend and the person on top of him (currently kissing his jaw), were not one and the same.

“ _AGHHHHHHHHHHH._ ” Pushing the person off of him as he screamed, Renly rolled over in a panic, only to find himself landing with a thud on the laminated floor. The other person, the other _guy_ , was screaming too now, though Renly wasn’t sure whether it was his own screaming that prompted that or the fact that he met a similar fate on the other side of the bed.

“WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!”

“Who the fuck am _I_?! You’re in my room! Who the fuck are _you_?!”

Before he could say another word, the door flew open, the sudden brightness as the light was turned on meaning he had to cover his eyes. “What is going on in h- _Renly_?”

Renly just wanted the ground to swallow him up. There he was, naked as the day he was born on the floor after falling out of bed with a man who was categorically not his girlfriend while said girlfriend stood over him wearing nothing but a (very attractive) set of lacy red underwear. “I used the key.”

Margaery looked as if she would burst out laughing at any moment. “Yes, I can see that. But would you care to tell me why you’re in bed with my brother?”

It wasn’t until she’d uttered that word that Renly even remembered that there was someone else in the room, looking over to see that the mystery man was now standing with a sheet wrapped around his waist, looking shocked, confused and pained in equal measures. He realised that he really couldn’t be blamed for mistaking the brother for Margaery; they shared many of the same features, so much so that the curly haired man could even be described as pretty. Mortified beyond belief as their eyes met and he felt something stir inside him again, Renly squeezed his eyes shut and let his head fall back against the side of the bed. “Because I’m an idiot who can’t count doors.”

Folding her arms across her chest, Margaery was seemingly uncaring that she, her brother and her boyfriend were all but naked in the same room. “Right. Well, I would introduce you to Loras but it seems that you two are already quite well acquainted with each other.”

“Oh god, please stop.”

“Loras, what do you think of my boyfriend? Hot, isn’t he?” the beautiful brunette smirked as only she could and said boyfriend just wanted to die.

“Hmm, I can certainly see why you like him,” Loras smirked, “even if he is a bit… _forward_. I must confess myself disappointed, I thought all my prayers had been answered.”

“That is a shame. I’m sure the two of you will get on famously though.”

This was all too much. “Could we please talk about this when I’m not bollock naked?”

Unable to keep it in any longer, both Tyrell siblings started to laugh, Margaery bending down to pick up the pair of briefs that her boyfriend had shed on the floor on the way in. She threw them at Renly’s head, who scowled before awkwardly pulling them on while still sitting on the floor. Once his modesty was preserved (what little of it he had left), he climbed to his feet, face turning a bright shade of red as he cast another glance in Loras’ direction. “Can we go to bed now?”

“I can’t believe you’re only back in the country a hot minute and you’re already cock-blocking me.”

“None of this is even remotely my fault! Your boyfriend crawled into bed with me, it’s not like I seduced him.”

Renly let out a little whimper at the reminder, cursing Stannis and Tywin Lannister and anyone else who could even be remotely to blame for this. Without saying another word, Margaery took him by the hand and led him towards the door. Before they were out of sight, Renly looked back at the other man one more time, unsurprised to see him still standing there with a smug look on his face. The sight went straight to his groin and, not for the first time that night, Renly felt like throwing himself down several flights of stairs.

Well, fuck.


End file.
